Friday, November 12, 2010

Earthbound Scrapbook Entry #8: I've Seen the Lights Go Out in Fourside (GPP8)

I watched the pathetic human children enter the department store from my perch in the (former) manager's office. They looked so content. Tearing them apart was going to be such an enjoyable experience.

I'm not sure why Master Giygas fears these insignificant whelps as much as he does, but that is not my concern. My job is to stop their progress... any way I want. Gwaagh!

First they went to the ATM, presumably obtaining the cash they need for food and new weapons. I allowed them to buy their pitiful new popguns and "armored" bracelets; it would be all the more entertaining to destroy them easily when they're at their strongest! They would die knowing nothing could have saved them! Gwagh!

"Go ahead, Ness," I said, licking my lips. "Chew some sugary bubble gum... BEFORE I CHEW YOUR SOUL!" Gwagh! Gwagh!

As they purchased equipment from my soulless human wageslaves, one of the children brushed up against the door to my office. I put my tentacles against it and breathed deeply. Gwagh! I could smell the fresh blood pulsing through her young veins. She and her friends were going to make a wonderful snack.

When they were finished feeding their addiction to material goods, they rode the escalator to the ground floor and headed towards the exit. Seeing them smile and laugh, seeing them feed french fries to that disgusting rat Ness keeps as a pet under his cap, seeing Ness wanting to hold Paula's hand... Gwaaaagh!! My body ached to be clad in quivering childflesh! (And possibly to hollow out their skulls and use them as festive pencil holders. Gwagh.)

I wrapped my tentacles around the power switch and forced it down. The lights flickered out and a chorus of confusion befell the useless humans inside. I rushed down to the first floor.

Paula clung to Ness as the idiot scientist boy tried to cobble together a flashlight from used chewing gum, two quarters and a pair of dirty socks. I grabbed Paula from behind, silencing her with my secret alien technology known as "chloroform." I slipped out the back exit and disposed of her lifeless body in the alley behind the department store, right where Master Giygas told me to leave her. Then I scaled the wall and leaped through the window and back into my office.

Jeff's makeshift flashlight switched on just as I returned to the security cameras. He swung it around wildly looking for his missing comrade.

"Paula!" he exclaimed. "Where are you?"

"Gwa, gwa, gwa! Gwaaaaagh!" I laughed. "Suffer the little children!"

I grabbed the intercom and bellowed, "Ness, customer Ness, please hurry to Paula... Gwaaaaaaagh!"

Watching to two teens get punished by Master Giygas's lesser followers on their way up to my office filled me with pleasure. Shocked, scalded and trampled, I was beginning to think there'd be nothing left for me to play with when the time came. They needed a little encouragement.

"Ness, customer Ness... Gwagh! Gwagh!"

Finally, the door swung open and Ness stood before me, beaten and bruised.

"Where's Paula?!" he demanded.

"Gwaaagh, Gwarrrgh! You finally made it. This department store is gonna be your grave! Gwaaagh. You will be gone, and you'll be burning in... Well, you'll go to heaven!"

"You won't," said a voice from behind me. I heard a loud explosion and felt pain down my back. Ness jumped forward and delivered a devastating blow to my head.

Jeff stepped out in front of me and pointed his weapon toward my chest. He did not have to fire.

I leaned on the office wall and began to lose consciousness. I slid down to the floor, somehow triggering the emergency power switch. The department store lights flashed back on.

The last thing I heard was Ness: "Jeff! We've got to go find Paula. I bet Monotoli might..."


I slipped away.

*   *   *

I had a vision of Master Giygas. His evil swirled through my consciousness. He told me death should not stop me. He said that I should continue to attack Ness and his friends.

The next thing I knew, I was standing next to my adversary on the streets of Fourside. He and Jeff were speaking to a simpleton who was apparently napping in the street. I lunged forth!


My tentacles sailed straight through my victim. He didn't react at all. I tried to see what went wrong, but my body was not visible. Gwagh, I knew what I had become. Rage burned inside me and I swore to destroy Ness and his friend no matter what the cost.

The simpleton got up and walked away, shoving past a group of spectators. Then the boys headed into the adjacent bar cafe.

"According to Everdred, we've got to check out the area behind the bartender - I mean, behind the server," said Jeff.

"How can we do that?" asked Ness.

"I'm not sure."

A wretched barfly stared intently in my direction. Could she see me?

"Gwaagh!" I yelled.

She smiled ever so slightly.

"I think I've found something!" said Jeff. I could sense a glorious evil just beyond reach.

"Master Giygas!? Are you here?"

"What's going on?!" exclaimed Ness.

The room was enveloped in a bizarre light.


*   *   *

The cafe was pitch back, save for a few dim, red lights. The music from the jukebox skipped and scratched, and came out an octave below what it should have been. Ahh, we were in Giygas's hands now. Gwagh!

"Where the heck are we?" asked Ness. He readied his bat, not knowing what else to do. Simple boy; always resorting to violence.

The barfly climbed upon the her table and a crowd gathered around her. They wiggled and slithered and screeched with glee.

"Do you know who's bones will be on display here?" she asked, staring into Ness's eyes. "The answer is... your bones. My bones. Bone's bones! Bone bone bone!"

The other patrons danced in ecstasy around her, chanting, "Bone bone bone."

Gwagh! The foolish childrens' pea brains couldn't fathom what was going on. Master Giygas's evil is so deliciously overwhelming.

Ness bolted for the door and Jeff, not wanting to be left alone in this place, followed.

The barfly screamed before they could get out the door: "Welcome to Moonside!"

Moonside's moon shone brightly outside, but blackness seemed to seep from everything around us.

"This is highly illogical," Jeff said.

"I've felt something like this before," said Ness. "This is what it felt like in Carpainter's shack back in Happy Happy Village. That crazy statue is causing this and my neighbor Pokey's boss is somehow involved. I know it. Follow me."

The pair started off down the dark streets. I again tried to attack them, but to no avail.

"Gwagh! Gwagh!! Master Giygas! How can I carry out your will if I can't affect the world around me?!"

As I raised my tentacles in frustration, fire shot up next to me. From the flames came a living hydrant. Another gesture brought a distorted clock that wailed for blood. Gwagh!

"Thank you Master Giygas! Thank you!"

I sent wave after wave of enemies shrieking after the pinhead children. They had no idea what was going on until Jeff was hit from behind by a crazed gas pump.

"Justice is served! Gwa gwa gwa! Gwaaaargh!"

*   *   *

I watched Ness dragging his friend's nearly dead body though the neon streets. I allowed him a small respite, just to see what his tiny brain would tell him to do next.

He tried to get the attention of a Moonside native.

"Excuse me sir, my friend and I are hurt! Is there somewhere to rest around here?"

"Hey! Parking meters! And you're walking around!" he replied.

"Please! I need help!"

"Welcome to Moonside," he replied. "Moon moon moon. Si si si oon oon de."

A man apparently dressed for the beach stared at the teens.

"Hello..." he said.

"Can you help us?" Ness asked desperately. "I think my friend is dying! He needs - "

"And, goodbye!"

Ness and Jeff vanished. I should have destroyed them when I had the chance!

"No! Gwagh! GWAAAAGH!"

*   *   *

I searched for those pathetic children for several hours, but I couldn't find any trace of them. Had they escaped somehow? I entered the Moonside Hotel one last time.

They had to be here.

A Moonsidian lounged on a nearby chair, her mouth twisted into a strange grin. Soon, Ness and Jeff emerged from one of the rooms across the hallway.

"Gwagh! Excellent" I said. They appeared to be somewhat healed of the injuries my minions inflicted upon them, but I was going to see to it that this condition did not last for long. We again stepped out into the Moonside nightscape.

Instead of roaming about, this time it appeared the duo knew where they were going.

"How amusing. Gwagh! The children have a plan."

As they darted off, they ran past a small puppy in a party hat.

"Yes, that's wrong. It's my birthday," he said. The rat Ness keeps under his baseball cap took one look at the beast and hid away again.

I sent another group of monsters to wear them down, but this time, instead of fighting as hard as they could, Ness and Jeff did their best to avoid battle.

"Gwagh! Where are they going!?"

Suddenly, I knew where they were headed.

"Master Monotoli and the statue! Minions, kill them on sight! Kill them NOW!"

*   *   *

They had followed the lightning to Monotoli's Moonside dwelling. I tried to stop them with my monsters, but the power of this place prevented them from getting too close to Master Monotoli and the Mani Mani statue.

Gwagh! All I could do was watch!

Ness's bat shattered a window less than six inches from Master Monotoli's head.

"Where's Paula!?" Ness demanded. He wound up for another swing.

"Don't do anything to me!" yelled the old man. "I am... I am not Monotoli!" He faded into the night, leaving  the Mani Mani statue to face Ness alone.

"Hello, boy..." it hissed.
*   *   *

With a final mighty blow, Ness shattered the nightmare statue.

"Gwagh!" I gwaghed.

For a moment nothing happened. I wondered if perhaps I had gotten the last laugh after all.

Without warning, the entirety of Moonside rumbled. My minions evaporated before me. Gwagh! Everything started fading away!

Ness and Jeff disappeared. I desperately tried to get at them, but I couldn't get any closer. Gwaaaaagh! No!

I could hear Master Giygas speaking to my mind. He told me I had failed. And failure would not be tolerated.

I felt my consciousness slipping away once more.

"No! Give me another chance! Master Giygas! No! Gwagh! GWAAAAAGH!!!"

My last thought was that even though he had defeated me, Ness would never see his beloved Paula ever again. Gwagh! GWAAAaaa....

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